So, for the past three weeks, discipline hasn't been around much in our house. It is now three weekends that he hasn't asked for my food journal. It is a good thing for me, if he ever does look at it there may be quite a reckoning. He hasn't really applied any of the consequences to any of the broken rules.
But that's OK, because my husband has been slowly dunning his cloak of authority, without fear of me trying to wear it with him, despite being sick. There was the scene in "Reality and Dreams" and a few others, that have not been as dramatic, involving our son were my husband took the lead.
The one thing my husband has yet to do is to come up with a rule of his own and implement it. I made the list of all our initial rules (with his approval). I added to them (with his approval) when it seemed needed.
Until last night.
We have people coming to stay in December for long weeks over the Holidays. He looked around the main living areas in our house and made the comment, "There is a lot of work that needs to be done to get the house ready. Can you please clear the table from your sewing and take the donation boxes?"
I have a lot of projects that, I am behind in sewing. The donation boxes, I admit I have let sit to long. I don't just do a spring cleaning. I do a fall cleaning also. I have boxes of books to be resold and/or donated to the public library. I still have a hugh box of my to big clothes (yah me!) that is waiting to be donated, I still haven't finished going through my closet. The books have been sitting for 2 months and the clothes for a month.
Suddenly, his manner, his body took on a very HoHy posture, head thown back, hands on hips. He looked at me very decisively and said,
" So, by what day do you think you can take care of this?"
Huh?
Then before my eyes, he kind of deflated and said, " You know this thing we are doing..........but really I am just too tired right now."
He didn't follow through with it. But, with him as sick as he has been this is a hugh step. I had a hugh smile inside.
So
I ask you
would you care to join me
in a little dance?
The one thing my husband has yet to do is to come up with a rule of his own and implement it. I made the list of all our initial rules (with his approval). I added to them (with his approval) when it seemed needed.
Until last night.
We have people coming to stay in December for long weeks over the Holidays. He looked around the main living areas in our house and made the comment, "There is a lot of work that needs to be done to get the house ready. Can you please clear the table from your sewing and take the donation boxes?"
I have a lot of projects that, I am behind in sewing. The donation boxes, I admit I have let sit to long. I don't just do a spring cleaning. I do a fall cleaning also. I have boxes of books to be resold and/or donated to the public library. I still have a hugh box of my to big clothes (yah me!) that is waiting to be donated, I still haven't finished going through my closet. The books have been sitting for 2 months and the clothes for a month.
Suddenly, his manner, his body took on a very HoHy posture, head thown back, hands on hips. He looked at me very decisively and said,
" So, by what day do you think you can take care of this?"
Huh?
Then before my eyes, he kind of deflated and said, " You know this thing we are doing..........but really I am just too tired right now."
He didn't follow through with it. But, with him as sick as he has been this is a hugh step. I had a hugh smile inside.
So
I ask you
would you care to join me
in a little dance?
It's a baby step, but it is a step. Steve started out that way too. He would say something and waver a little on it. But the next time he'd be a little more confident.
ReplyDeleteNow I'm off to dance around the room in your honor.
Hugs,
Dana
I feel like it is a hugh step, like that first spanking done and over with. I am always afraid he is losing interest in this DD thing, because due to one thing and another, it has been an incredibly slow process. It made me feel warm inside, that he automatically went there without anything from me. I promise, at that moment .......it wasn't even in my mind. I fully expect when he is finally over his infection, I may not be so impatient to get things moving but want him to slow things down. : )
DeleteHugs back at ya, Dana!
I'll dance too...! Over here it is like we take a few steps, and then sit on the couch- watch Laurence of Arabia...and think about dancing again..lol. Been told a million times if we've been told once, eh Blue Bird?- baby steps ...it is still forward progression!
ReplyDeleteGood on you to see the positive!
Wilma
I wish we were watching Lawrence of Arabia......it feels like we are doing nothing but watching Doctor Zhivago. Ugh! But I see promise for the future and I keep holding on to that.
DeleteI will take every chance I get to dance!
Thanks Wilma
Baby steps and patience BB - you're doing great! I'm doing my happy dance for you. Ya know, you might want to reconsider "shaking that booty" when his HoH mojo kicks in! LOL
ReplyDeleteBlessings,
Cat
Ha! I caught you out! You left a comment on RBW's blog acknowledging patience was a virtue you could NOT claim. Out with it! What was the hardest thing you had to learn to be patient with in DD?
Delete: D
Thanks for the encouragement. It helps sometime hearing it to keep focused.
I might not be able to help "shaking that booty" once his mojo kicks in! He may keep it shaking for my against my will! : )
ROFL - yoa caught me - I might counsel patience but that doesn't mean that I am patient! ;) For me, one of the hardest things requiring patience was when Matthew and I would discuss something and he would "take it under advisement". grrrr Waiting for him to make a decision caused pain in my booty more than one. LOL
DeleteNot much you can do if he shakes your booty - just wouldn't suggest shaking it at him. ;)
Blessings,
Cat
It is great! Gives you that warm fuzzy feeling inside. NOw...don't forget to actually put the stuff away and then check in and let him know it's done. Bet you get a big hug.
ReplyDeleteLOL, Cat is right. When he's feeling better, you probably don't want to be shaking your "bear" bottom at him.
Humm...that gives me an idea for tomorrow's Love our Lurkers day post. Thanks Blue Bird!
LOL! I will be sure to come by and read your post to see if I can figure out what idea I gave you.
DeleteD told me again yesterday that he likes it when he can make me giggle. It's not something I do with anyone except my kids, and I told him that. He is unique, my D. He seeks out the girl in me, but quietly, subtly, and I let him. I let him, and I respond to that, and I want to. I can't begin to explain how significant that is. He knows more than anybody that it really isn't me, but still I let it happen. Anyway, all that was a lead-in to say this to you:
ReplyDeleteThis post, and the comments, really spoke to me and caused my thoughts to take flight into a place I needed to see from a different, higher angle. Thank you all for that.
And, BB, I think Susie nailed this for you - she is very wise, so I suggest you take her sage advice to heart. Do as he asked, then let him know. Cat, Wilmey and Dana are exactly right about those baby steps. We're all so smart and wise! ;-)
{Hugs} my friend.
Irishey
I am glad it could help someone else.
DeleteI am trying to do those things he asked of me right now, but i keep allowing myself to be distracted by the need to comment everywhere on blog land. : )
Hugs back!
I don't know why, but my dancing bear image with his shaking booty keeps disappearing. If any one knows how I can keep it there I would appreciate the info.
ReplyDeleteThanks
BB - Your bear keeps disappearing because you linked to the image on webweaver. He/she suggest you download the image to your computer and then upload to your blog - that would probably keep it from disappearing.
DeleteHope this helps,
Cat